Monday, February 22, 2010

Schools in Our Bedrooms? No Way!

Were you as outraged as I was about the story from PA in which a school official secretly activated a webcam on a laptap loaned to a student? The only response from the officials that I can find on internet searches is that they can turn on the webcam to locate a missing laptop. No problem with that here.

But this does not seem to be the case with Blake Robins. He says he was just eating candy and using the computer at home. The next day he was called into the school office and accused of possibly selling drugs. For proof, they produced a photo taken of him from the webcam the night before. Was it drugs or candy he was eating that night? I am sure I don't know, but this family insists it was candy.

Regardless, what right did the school have to turn on the webcam in that case? Not once have the officials claimed that the laptop was reported missing or lost. Is this just a case of an over-zealous administrator? Or a pervert hoping to see something that is better left private? There is certainly more to this story and I hope the full truth comes out.

How many more kids have potentially been victimized without their knowledge by this vice principal? We need to know.

Word of warning: A "free" computer may not be that free after all.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Tiger Woods--A Great Opportunity for Parents

Ok, who else is tired of Tiger Woods being in the news today? He apologized--let it go. Does what he did affect my life? Not one bit. Will the economy rebound if he answers more questions? Nope. What he did affects his immediate family and no one else.

Yes, I know he has been an icon for adults and children for a long time. And he has fallen off his pedestal. Last I looked, the world was still turning and rotating around the sun. I know that many children admire him and parents are afraid that they will imitate this sexual behavior trying to be like Tiger. It is possible.

But parents can use this opportunity to teach and guide their kids. Remind them that all celebrities are human and, as such, are subject to the inevitable mistakes we all make. Did he make a big one? Absolutely, and did it over and over again. The good that can come from his blunder is a valuable tool for parents to use. Explain to them that sometimes fame comes with a high price tag--lack of privacy. You cannot have one without the other.

Celebrities should be admired for the work and perseverance they have put into their sport or craft, rather than for how they dress, talk, or live their personal lives. It is a great opportunity for parents to show kids how to separate the two.

Use his example to talk to your kids about sex, especially unprotected sex (seriously, Tiger, unprotected sex with a porn star? What were you thinking?). Then talk to them about how in this digital age, it is almost impossible to make an error of judgment without the whole world finding out. For example, a young girl that send a "sext" message to her boyfriend may soon find it on the internet for the rest of the school to see. She thinks it is innocent fun, then suddenly she is a "slut" and everyone is laughing at her.

You can also use this self-induced tragedy to teach your kids that they have to come clean when it is discovered they have strayed. Don't try to hide it; it is easier to make things blow over if you just own up to the lapse in good sense, apologize, do whatever is appropriate, and let it die a natrual death.

Do I still admire Tiger? Sure I do--on the golf course. He worked hard to get where he was. He struggled and practiced and failed and kept trying. He changed how people see golf. What is not to admire? I am sad that he let his family down, but again, that is his tragedy. It is not mine. And we parents should use this example to help our kids learn to make good decisions in their lives. At least some benefit can come from all of this. I am sure that Tiger would be happy about that.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Helping Children Through Nightmares

How many of us have had nightmares in our lives? They can be really scary--so much so that you don't want to go back to sleep sometimes. And our children have them too. How are we parents supposed to help our kids feel better after a nightmare when we don't know how to do it for ourselves?



One thing we can do is listen to the details of the nightmare. Have the child tell you exactly what happened. Yes, I know this is probably 3 am but she needs you right now, not 5 hours from now. As the child talks about the dream, discuss it with her on her level. If it is an older child, maybe you could suggest that the monster in the dream may really be the math test that she is nervous about. If it is a small child, go through the room and look everywhere for the monster. Then do a monster removal dance or ceremony in which you tell the monster that it cannot come back.



Sometimes, just letting the child snuggle next to you for a few minutes in your bed will make them feel more at ease. Or I have also gotten in bed with the child (in their bed) to "protect" them if the monster comes back. It never did, because it knew I was there.



The next day, maybe the child could draw a picture of what scared him in the dream and you can talk about it. Talking about whatever it is will minimize the effect on the child. Have a dream dictionary so you can both look up the meanings of certain dream symbols.



When we have an understanding of what dreams are and what the symbology is, dreaming takes on a whole new role in our lives. It is there that our conscious lets down and we can get messages or creative ideas. According to Anne Hill, dreamworker and host of Dream Talk Radio http://www.annehill.org/ , dreams of all sorts, even nightmares, should be celebrated because they are trying to teach us or tell us something.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

WAHM's, Need a Marketing Edge?

So many moms are running a home-based business these days in order to make ends meet. As you have discovered, it is important to have some kind of edge; a reason for someone to open your email or read your direct mail piece.

First, let me say that I don't usually use this blog to promote products, but I have used this one effectively in the past. So I want to share it with you. Besides, it is just fun.

Heidi Richards Mooney has developed the Quirky Marketing Calendar- How to Use Zany and Non-traditional Holidays to Promote Your Business 365 Days a Year (4th Edition). Like any calendar, it is full of dates. Unlike any calendar, it explains why that date is important. For instance, today is February 11th. It is White Shirt Day--so offer a discount to anyone wearing a white shirt or give a prize to every 3rd white shirt that comes through the door. Think of how many people will come into your business or check your website if you are offering a zany special every day...or every week.

Check it out by clicking on the icon on this blog site. Have fun with it.

Want To Be On TV?

Lately I have been watching a show on CMT called World's Strictest Parents. Interesting. For me, it is very thought provoking. If you haven't seen it, here is the skinny: kids with respet issues raised in not strict homes are sent to very strict homes for a week to learn how good they had it at home. Living under different standards from their families back home, the teens are subject to consequences for breaking rules and skipping chores while the strict parents attempt to mend their ways.

It is sad to me that so many kids feel so entitled to everything they have and do not have to work for anything. What happened to doing chores around the house? Has that suddenly become illegal? How do parents expect their kids to go out into the real world and become successful when they don't have a clue how to take care of themselves, let alone a business or a job?

The strict parents on the show are even more strict than I was--insert my kids here who are asking, is that possible? Some of what they expect these lazy, indulged kids to do is out there but is also eye-opening for them. And the funny thing is that the kids develop attachments to the strict parents because everything is tempered with love and sincerity. Children know when you are being fake and when you are really interested in them.

For me, it is a lesson to all parents to teach responsibility and respect to kids: for themselves, for their family, for other people, and for nature.

The best part is that now they are casting for new unruly kids and strict parents for upcoming episodes. If you are interested, you can click on this link: http://www.theworldsstrictestparents.com/

Happy parenting!

Monday, February 8, 2010

Pick Me Up and Let Me Walk

Communications with our children is always a challenge--no matter what the age. Some of my grandchildren are being taught Baby Sign in an effort to improve pre- and early speech communication. There are also programs out there that are meant to help kids learn to read at an early age. I love that so much emphasis is being placed on communication and books and reading. It is an area that has been too long overlooked.

Having said that, there are times when our kids communicate with us in no uncertain terms. There is no mistaking the message. One of those instances occurred yesterday at my son's house. His 8 month old son loves for you to hold his fingers and let him walk around the house. Yesterday we had all had a several turns and our aching backs told us to let him crawl for a while. My son, Nathanael's dad, had him last, laid him on the carpet, and let go of his little fingers.

Nathanael crawled about 4 inches before he started talking--it was baby gibberish, but it was clear that he was pissed. He would turn his head back to his daddy, give him an evil look, and start in jabbering again in that frustrated voice. We were all pretty sure what he wanted. So Nathanael's dad presented his fingers and the baby, grabbing them, scrambled to his feet with a big smile on his face. And they were off! Very clearly, this child will be a good communicator.

Find ways to help you kids communicate from the time they are born. It is a big help to you as you try to unravel their differing communication patterns.

Since I am talking about communication and reading and such, let me mention to anyone in the Atlanta Metro area that Cathy Puett Miller will be at Yawn's Bookstore in Canton, GA on Feb. 11 for a book signing. Her books, Anytime Reading Readiness, a guidebook for parents of 3-6 year olds AND Before They Read, a partner book for teachers of preschool AND kindergarten will be featured.

Cathy was my guest on Parents Rule! on Dec 3 discussing these very topics. She was delightful and informative. The show can still be heard or downloaded from the following site: http://www.radiosandysprings.com/showpages/parents.php So go say hi and check out her books.